Why does Disney make movies based on theme park attractions? Well, probably because they made a lot of money off The Pirates of the Caribbean franchise. Sure, they tried a Haunted Mansion movie before, but I haven’t really seen that. I will say I have been on the ride twice during both of my trips to DisneyWorld. It’s fine. But this is the week after “Barbenheimer,” and the pickings for new movies are kinda slim. Besides, this new take on the ride does have an impressive cast. Now, I will do my best to be fair, but really, movies based on theme parks just seems sad. I suppose it could be worse. It could be a movie based on a board game.
Man, why isn’t Theater Camp out in my neck of the woods yet?
Ben Matthias (LaKeith Stanfield) is a former astrophysicist in a bad place. His wife passed unexpectedly, and he lost his reputation and position due to his invention of a literal spirit camera. Now he works as a tour guide. Meanwhile, single mom Gabbie (Rosario Dawson) and her young son Travis (Chase W. Dillon) have just moved into what turns out to be a very haunted mansion outside of New Orleans. When exorcist Father Kent (Owen Wilson) offers Ben a job to take some ghost photos, Ben agrees despite not believing in ghosts. There’s just one problem: anyone who steps foot in the house will be followed by a ghost or two if they try to leave until they come back to more or less stay. That means Travis and Kent are soon themselves residents of the house. There must be a way to get the ghosts to leave. To that end, the group recruits medium Harriet (Tiffany Haddish) and local paranormal historian Professor Bruce Davis (Danny DeVito).
The thing is, the evil thing at the center of the mansion has a goal, and there’s a ticking clock. There have been numerous deaths in the mansion as pretty much everyone else that has moved in since the evil thing arrived has died a ironic death. That’s bad enough, but it gets worse when someone considers that whatever is behind all this supernatural mess seems to be coming close to a goal. Ben and the others will need to figure out who’s behind all this and what they want fast if they want to do better than the denizens of the mansion and get out of this mess alive.
Now, I have said before I grew up more a fan of Bugs Bunny than Mickey Mouse, but I do remember a lot of those old live action Disney movies. They were basically harmless, mild comedies, something that would work for a child but would probably be seen as at-best harmless for adults. Haunted Mansion reminds me of those sorts of movies. Yes, the movie works hard to get the look of the ride right inside the mansion and to use what passes for lore with a theme park attraction, but there isn’t much here. The characters are fairly basic with Jamie Lee Curtis and Jared Leto appearing as some of the more memorable ghosts from the ride’s lore. Then again, I mostly know the lore at all thanks to, of all things, a Muppets special.
That said, Stanfield is really giving this movie his all. In fact, he’s too good for this movie. Yes, the rest of the name cast are fairly well-established actors, but given the level of material, Stanfield is going a bit above and beyond. No one else, save known weirdo Leto, seems to put in the effort as much as he does. I just wish the material he was given was as good as the performance he’s giving. As for the movie, if you’re curious at all, just wait for it to hit Disney+ in a couple months.
Grade: C
0 Comments