A good horror movie, even a horror comedy like Vampires vs. the Bronx that is currently steaming on Netflix, often stand in for more than just the obvious scary thing. In this case, the real danger comes not from hungry vampires but something much more frightening to many lower-income people in poor areas: gentrification. The movie doesn’t even try to hide that general representation. The vampires move in and local businesses are bought up and their owners disappear.
It’s just that since this is a horror-comedy, that disappearance doesn’t mean the owner moved to the suburbs with their pay-out.
After a brief prologue where a nail salon owner (Zoe Saldana in a cameo) sells her shop but then meets the new owner, we meet the three main characters, a trio of boys in the same Bronx neighborhood. Miguel, AKA Little Mayor (Jaden Michael), is a lad trying to keep his favorite bodega open with a block party/fundraiser. Bobby (Gerald W. Jones III) at least looks a little older and is considering running with the same gang his late father once associated with. And bookish Luis (Gregory Diaz IV) is a bit of a nerd with a mother that is far more protective than even the others have. All three lack fathers and have the bodega owner Tony (Joel “The Kid Mero” Martinez) as their male role model. None of the boys seem all that happy to see the mysterious Murnau Properties buying up all the buildings in the neighborhood, but there doesn’t seem to be much any of them can do about it. Rents are going up for people like Tony, and they may not be long for the area anyway.
However, Little Mayor sees a local tough get taken out by what can only be a vampire. No one seems to really believe him aside from Bobby and Luis, but what can three boys do? Their mothers are watching them like hawks, the local priest (Method Man) is on them about church attendance, and even Tony is a bit skeptical. Can these boys either prove to the rest of the neighborhood that something is wrong or deal with the undead themselves using whatever they can get their hands on? Fortunately, Luis is a bit of a geek and knows all about vampire strengths and weaknesses, but when the local cops seem to be on the bad guy’s side, the boys may need to find other ways to save the day and the Bronx.
As satire, Vampires vs the Bronx is a bit too on-the-nose. It more or less spells out the gentrification angle early in the movie. Likewise, the identity of the head vampire isn’t exactly a surprise to anyone but the characters in the movie. However, this was still a fun movie in the same sort of vein as Attack the Block with its street kids fighting aliens. The boys are all charming performers, and aside from Saldana, the cast is filled out more with familiar faces rather than big names if anything. The scares work, the laughs work, and the movie as a whole works. Even if the movie has a familiar feel too it, it’s supposed to be about a neighborhood that is home to these characters. Perhaps it should feel familiar.
Grade: B+
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